Is Your Awakening on the Darker Side?

This video and blog post are inspired by the handful of writers who reach out to let me know they are struggling. I dig through the garbage dump to find one small glimmer of hope and I get that not everyone feels hopeful. Part of my attitude can be described as a bit ‘pollyannish’ and maybe with even more of an ability to see past the storm clouds to look for a rainbow. We as a human society see so much darkness in the world, that we must work a bit harder to find the light.

First, watch as I share some of my insights into Navigating the Dark Side of Awakening….

Awakening to what everyone talks about as expanding light frequencies and only feeling, and seeing darkness around you can cause most people to wonder what is wrong with themselves. You might feel certain that some people have a brokenness, which is not surmountable. Then as our spiritual days are filled with the ‘Great Awakening’, ‘Expansive wisdom and knowledge’, or ‘Evolution enlightenment’ can strain under the weight of the darker sides of life. If your physical, emotional, and mental health is strained, to the breaking point, then you may be left feeling quite tainted and skeptical of what all spiritual people are currently expressing as light and love. I found a blog article about experiencing darkness while seeking light. The journey in the blog may trigger if you have had spiritual teachers who can perpetuate the cycle of trauma. Otherwise, it is such a great story of finding the light again.

What do I mean by awakening on the darker side? I am not talking about evil, hateful, negative, toxic, or so traumatized you will never reach the light. Awakening means you are awake to everything that is going on around you. You can see the truth, with people, your job, corruption, criminal hurtful intentions, and when you are being manipulated. Awakened is your ability to feel, see, and know that you are heading in a brighter, lighter, direction of greater ease and happiness, even if all the 3D signals around you indicate the opposite. You can be awakened and still have a dark cloud of old energy debris that circles your head and entire energy field. A crystal clear stream of water can become cloudy from turbulent flows stirring up the silt on the bottom. Your human energy field is the same. Like the crystal clear stream is still clear water, it has silt floating around. You remain bright, clear, and radiant, but you just have old energy stirred up and that is all you can see about yourself.

Your light can experience a bright spark of illuminating shifts, just enough to break open old stuck energy patterns. When those old energies fill up your aura, you may feel as if you are filled with darkness but you are the awakened light unable to see through the swirling patterns of dark clouds. When I worked with unhoused (homeless) youth, when they closed their eyes they could only see themselves as dark however, when they followed my guiding meditation voice, the light cut through and dissolved the dark clouds. These young adults were so happy to know that they had a soul, that shined a bright light for their thoughts to follow.

There is a reason at the energetic quantum levels that can explain why you are experiencing more cloudy days than you would like. Why do you wish to be on the winning side of awakening but continue to get up on the darker side of the bed every day? There is more than one reason why this is happening in many parts of our global humanity. As a clairvoyant nurse, who has witnessed thousands of human energy fields, there are 5 energy patterns that I find are most common. Let’s jump into these patterns and see if any of them fit for you

One

Dark clouds above and around the top of the head area. This can be a result of your own negative thinking, getting caught in conspiracy theory thinking obsessive loops, watching too much news, and violent movies, or overdoing it in the game-playing department. Or it can also be from surrounding yourself with negative people who project their dark thinking onto you. Your light may be bright, but just like wearing dark sunglasses the dark clouds may interfere with your ability to know just how bright the sun is. Leading you towards struggling to see your light.

What Can you do to shift this pattern?
Be mindful of your diet of news, violent,ce and war movies, too much game playing, or hanging out with toxic people who only share negative, conspiracy-type thinking. Create by imagining a grounding image such as an ancient tree with roots going down to the center of the earth. As you increase the strength of your grounding the dark cloudy energy from around the head, will drain off.

Two
Dark cloudy energy is compressed inside the auric field. Each of the chakras is filled with old pain, that when stirred up looks cloudy. The individual’s human spirit brings the light down but the light is blocked by the compressed energy inside. Therefore the golden light of the soul creates a radiant ring of gold around the outside of the aura, that can be 1-6 feet thick. Often the individual appears as if they are doing well, but inside they are suffering.

What can you do to shift this pattern?
Create a drain through grounding to the center of the earth. Drain the dark cloudy energy like unplugging a bathtub, then allow the gold on the outside of your aura to move back inside of your aura and chakras.

Three

The light inside the auric field is suppressed by a broad darker ring of cloudy energy that limits your light. This darker cloudy energy often is negative thinking, hatred, self-criticism, and unworthiness. This can leave the individual feeling unworthy of the awakening process no matter how many ways you participate in awakening programs. This can leave you feeling as if you are being passed by. These old thoughts are suppressing the beautiful light.

What can you do to shift this pattern?
Create a grounded force of energy, that also functions as a drain. Drain the cloudy energy from outside of the aura, down the grounding. Then expand your inner golden light to radiate through any remaining cloudiness on the outside until it washes away.

Four
Old traumatic experiences can result in the individual leaving their body and hiding in a separate place inside their own auric field. Often this appears as a tunnel, in the crown (spiritual) chakra, that leads to a little womb to crawl into for safety. This tunnel can lead you to feel dark, and absent from your own light. It is like an escape hatch, when you feel threatened. So that you can separate yourself from the threat.

What can you do to shift this pattern?
When working with trauma in the human energy field (Based on my experience), the individual will need to resolve the threat, perceived threat or post traumatic stress from threats in earlier situations that you struggle to let go. A skilled therapist can assist you build your inner strength and resilience, so that when the portal to the womb is ready to be closed you feel safe enough to do that.

Five
Complete disassociation from your human energy field can cause an individual to function in life from their human mind abilities. Their spirit can be as far away as 20 to 500 feet away from the body. The further away consciousness of your spirit is from your body the less you can feel what is going on inside your body. Meaning, you may not feel any sadness, grief, hurt, anxiety or depression. The more you learn to ground back into your body, the more you start to feel again and those feelings just might not be too pleasant.

What can you do to shift this?
Similar to the portal/tunnel to a safe energy womb like structure, when you have experienced things in life that cause you to leave your body, you just may want to seek a skilled Therapist who specializes in trauma type therapy. Yes, grounding your energy field, can assist you to feel safe and emotionally stable, but it can take months or years to reverse the dissociative pattern. Seeing an energy healer can help dissolve the energy of the trauma as well.

Your awakening on the darker side can truly indicate you are moving in a positive direction towards healing. Living in a disconnected dissociative way in your life can feel light, and energizing, can perform in peak ways, because you are not aware of your physical body. You might move through the world, feeling happy, and joyful, and not a care in the world as if nothing bothers you. That is because you again, are not able to hear the concerned signals coming from your body. As the awakening light expands in its higher frequencies, you begin to create a light body, so more of your spirit can move into your humanness again. Suddenly, you start to see, sense, feel, and hear the aches and pains, worries, anxieties, and emotions that you were not able to feel before. I suggest also reading my other blog post, Hungry for Higher Knowledge.

Often this shows up in other ways for those who are used to feeling very intuitive. Then when they join my intuitive development courses it can feel as if all their abilities are suddenly gone. The individual’s intuition is not gone at all. It is simply, that the person becomes much more grounded in themselves, and the old energy can block those intuitive impressions from being accessed in the way you could before. Once the old energy dissolves and drains down the grounding permanently, then the intuitive insights are bright again. In fact, intuitive abilities have greater depth and accuracy when coming from a well-grounded state. Once you master grounding, your intuitive abilities go beyond what you thought was possible.

Is your awakening a bit on the darker side? Then know that you are making movement into a balanced state. We all carry the emotional wounds of our past, and the worries for our future. Some days we all are better at navigating this than other days. We are human but we are not the sum of our painful parts. Your soul light is brighter than a thousand LED lights. But it must be grounded through your body to illuminate the way for you. This requires choosing to run your energy by meditating daily. You can link to free meditations available located on my website.