Believe in Yourself!

We are a construct of beliefs! We have thoughts, ideas, judgments and criticisms that are the glue that holds our belief systems in place. We believe that we are our life experiences. We believe that we are the outcomes of our traumas, abuses, gifts or privileges.

When we are younger, our beliefs are more fluid, as we observe the world and people around us. When we grow older those loose beliefs can become more rigid, causing us to have very little wiggle room to open our minds to different possibilities. We can expect those around us to fit in that same box we were raised in. When our external world changes, it can challenge our inner rigidness of beliefs and then what do you do?

In 1994, as a wife, mother and nurse, looking back, I can remember that overall feeling was one of pure survival. Working, making money, to pay bills to live. Working, Running errands, grocery shopping, and taking my children to their school activities, filled each day, leaving little time for myself.

Then, the out of body experience, I had shocked me into the truth that I was a soul and that my body was simply the vehicle. My spirit had been trying to get my attention for years and I had mastered the ability to override that inner voice that was calling to me. I was highly skilled at maintaining that outer appearance that all was okay. My husband, children and I were showing the strain of a life held together by a thread. We did not know the signs of our spirit calling to us to step forward in a greater way, a more balanced way in our lives. My inner world had totally collapsed and my outer environment no longer fit. Yep, I was pretty much a mess because I had hung on to my rigid beliefs far longer than my spirit could stand.

I often describe our daily journey in life as one where our mind/ego is in the front seat of our car, with our car being our body. Our spirit is in the back seat, kind of like the back seat driver. We love having a back seat driver when we are in a new place and do not recognize our surroundings. Yet there are other times, we find a back seat driver annoying when we feel that we have everything under control. Telling our spirit in the back seat, “Don’t tell me what to do, I know what I am doing!”

When your spirit might tell your mind driving your car to turn right at the corner and take a different way to work. We will override that voice, not believing that our inner voice, the voice of our spirit, really knows what it is doing. Many have not been taught to trust that voice. Many have been raised to trust the voice of their parents, their spouse, their friends, and maybe even a psychic, more than the inner voice of their own soul.

We, being creative souls that we are, we can have so much doubt and confusion that we fill our aura and chakras with belief systems from our religions, educational systems, books, politicians, and societal norms to help us to make decisions in our life. Some of you will find that you have rigid beliefs, limiting thought patterns and fear of doing something wrong. These beliefs can literally block your own spirit from getting through to you. Following the bread crumbs set out for you by others you value in your life can feel really safe and comfortable therefore may be the path that you choose for yourself in life.

When you struggle to believe in yourself you have two choices of people to surround yourself with. 1. You may surround yourself with a circle of family, friends, partners that take every opportunity to knock you down, criticize you, tell you to play it safe, or refuse to support your vision.

2. You may choose to surround yourself with people who have a higher belief in you than you have in yourself. Family, friends, partners who help you to remember your dream, desires, and inspirations to keep moving forward. Who hop in the car with you to drive to another state for a job interview, help you pack and move with promises to visit often.

What do you believe in? Do you even know? Writing down a list of things you think you believe in can be a great place to start. We often have an easier time looking at what we believe to be true in the outer world before we can explore how to believe in ourselves.

Make a list of things that you believe in. First begin with what you physically believe such as; Exercise can build a healthy heart. That is a fairly easy one. However you might have a belief that obese people are unhealthy. Both of these beliefs can be true and yet these can be something that you hold as true but it might be a lie. For example; We all have heard of runners, who follow a healthy diet, sleep well and meditate that can have a sudden heart attack and die. Or I have friends who are considered medically obese and yet when their heart is studied is stronger than others who follow a regular healthy exercise and eating program who are thinner.

Emotional beliefs; People who cry a lot are mentally unstable, or weak. You may believe this is true and yet what I can see in the energy field is that those who have a capacity to express emotions can have a clearer energy field because the tears can wash the aura and chakras.

Mental Beliefs; Smart, intelligent people who went to college, have it all together! A lot of people believe this. This belief can cause major insecurities if you did not finish high school or never went to college. If you have this belief that you hold inside as true then you will never believe you can accomplish anything from not feeling smart enough. I have been reading human energy fields for 25 years and can say without hesitation that it does not matter how wealthy or educated you are…NO ONE HAS IT ALL FIGURED OUT!

Spiritual beliefs; You might believe that that one religion is better than another, or that psychics practice dark magic. These can be beliefs that you hold inside, deep inside as true but as you explore more begin to question where that belief came from. These beliefs mentioned are fairly common beliefs and yet, they can also limit you to know what you believe in for yourself.

I suggest that you write down in each category; Physical, Emotional, Mental, and Spiritual, as least 10 things you believe under each title. Try to simply allow the belief to come to the surface without filters or judgement. Then take each belief under one category and follow the bread crumbs back as far as you can to see where that belief came from. Who was the originator? Is it a belief that you believe because of a life experience you had or is it a belief because someone told you to believe it? This level of untangling your beliefs will help you to become clearer on believing in yourself.

As an ICU Nurse, I checked into my shift, and readied myself for shift change report from the other nurses going off duty. One patient had come in the night before, after holding a woman hostage in a hotel room surrounded by police. The man stabbed the woman and the police shot him. By the time I had been assigned to him as his nurse for my shift, he had been through surgery to save his life. When I walked into his room to take his vital signs, I gasped in horror. Not horror at the patient but horror at myself. He was a white male, but my mind had told me he would be a man of color.

Why was I so horrified at myself? That fact that I was not raised that way. My parents had parties filled with friends of color, religion, and sexuality. I dated others of different ethnic back grounds. So when the nursing report mentioned a 35 year old male patient, my deeper beliefs made the leap into thinking it was someone of color…not a white man. It was so deeply jarring to me, that I began to explore just what other things I believed in the background that shaped how I moved through the world. I felt shame.

When it comes to believing in yourself, you will want to go through the same process. What do you believe about your physical body shape, your weight, your eyes, mouth, and facial expressions. What do you believe about your emotional state, your creativity, your sexual desires? How about how you think? Do you believe you are smart, even genius, or do you believe you are dumb, slow, ADHD, or dyslexic? How about your spiritual beliefs? Do you believe there is a God, a higher power that manages the universe or do you believe more in physics and everything is just pure energy? Do you believe in past lives? Do you believe organized religion is corrupt?

There is no right or wrong answer to those questions, so allow yourself to be open and free with your answers, without judgement, or attachment, or looking over your shoulder to see who might be listening in case your beliefs differ from theirs!

Once you identify what you believe about yourself, then cultivate those qualities that make you uniquely you. If you believe you are smart, then be honest and say to others, I am smart, I am clever, I have a mind that can quickly process challenging concepts! Own it 100%, stand in your belief with both feet and do not shy away from it. Call your own spirit forward to illuminate your strengths and shine them for all the world to see. If you find that you have some beliefs about yourself that are not so pretty, then write a list of ways to start turning it around. Such as, I feel dump, I am not smart and what action steps can you take to turn that thinking into a more balanced belief.

I know this blog, talks about a very broad umbrella of a subject and there is not way I can dive deep into it in this blog, but I hope that it gives you something to stir the senses and curiosity.

When I am asked what I believe in, my answer is this; My beliefs about myself are different than they were 5 years ago and I know that my beliefs about myself will be different 5 years from now in the future. Now, I try an embody those positive aspects I believe to be true for me in this moment. The not so positive aspects I meditate on and set my intention to learn more about myself and why I embody them, what purpose have they served me.

Get to know yourself …grow to believe in yourself! You have come to this earth to be a unique being of light. Now let yourself shine!